Felt like something was there

Do you ever feel like each phase in your life is like moving on to the next chapter in a book? Each telling a story, some leaving you with questions, others so exciting that you stay up all night reading, and some making you feel like you just want to close that book and never open it again.

Felt like something was there... are photographs made from moments that hold deep and intense emotions. The sensations that accompany our experiences linger long after we have moved on from them. When we revisit a photograph, smell something familiar, or feel someone’s touch, these sensory cues can bring us back to the most personal memories and reactivate the emotions associated with those same moments. A photograph can become a portal, allowing us to encounter something from that chapter.

This is a personal story of how someone can feel abandoned and alone, while simultaneously being the person who supported many others, the roller coaster of being everyone’s savior except one’s own. Each chapter represents a part of that journey: the loneliness, the searching, the unraveling, and eventually the realization that I could choose what came next.

The disintegrating of those chapters does not need to mean forgetting completely. Memories remain with us; they become part of the story we carry. But with time, we can begin to see those chapters differently. We can close some books, return to others, and choose which stories we want to continue writing.

For me, that next chapter has been about finding peace in the love and presence of the people who stayed, those who chose to listen, love, and support me without conditions. My chosen family.

About This Project
This project received a 2022 grant from the Collective Futures Fund.

It was exhibited at the Leica Gallery in Boston, MA as part of the group exhibition “Seeing Across Generations” with Constatine Manos and Stella Johnson.